I’ve been reading some wonderful books by Elisabeth Oglevie, and I’m on the eleven of twelve in our library. Although there is certainly romance, the books are very tastefully written and family oriented — that is — with the exception of one book called the Seasons Here After. Each of the books can be read by itself, but many are in a series called the Bennet’s Island Saga. The one book I struggled to get through is called “The Seasons Here After” and is basically a book about an affair or cheating. I give her credit for trying to tackle this very difficult subject, but wow was it hard to read!
Certainly cheating is a big part of music and has been for a very long time. I even understand there’s a reality TV show called “Cheaters”. There are the same old lines used about leaving him/her at the right time which never seems to be now. Sometimes there’s a break, sometimes they are found out, and as in the case of the book, sometimes they go back to their spouses . I am tempted by a lot of things, but cheating has not been among them. I don’t believe it will be.
Recently a couple I know broke up, and there is a new relationship in the picture. I think it’s fair to say I don’t know any of the three people well, but I like them all very much. The marriage was the second for one of the parties, and a similar pattern seemingly occurred with the first marriage. It’s not my place to say whether cheating was involved, because I don’t know and don’t want to. I worry that a few years down the line, a similar pattern will emerge, but I would be so happy to be wrong — particularly after experiencing the new couple together in a public setting. I’ve certainly heard theories that cheating happens, because people want the feelings of young love again, and that sweet state is fleeting.
My heart was softened when I remembered the young love Phil and I shared long distance. Life was so exciting then, and probably for the first time in my life, I looked forward to getting up in the morning — particularly because we were both alive and in love. Being apart was agonizing, but computer technology and the phone helped soften the blow. Today, computer technology would be even more involved in a relationship like ours, (and the phone bills would be a lot lower!) Being apart allowed us to really get to know each other. I will say I’m a lot more partial to young love than the club scene where in many instances, it’s just about a sex partner for the night.
On August 17, Phil and I will have been married for 17 years. This doesn’t sound like much and isn’t even close to golden anniversaries of older couples, but when I think about young love, sometimes I feel old. Even without any human children, Phil and I have endured a lot together
–unemployment, countless health crises, and loss of our guides / fur kids. Though I may miss young love, there’s something to be said for enduring love. Many of the hearts, flowers, demonstrative gestures, and glossing over of flaws may not be there anymore, but the steady rock is. The pages of life are certainly tattered and torn both by circumstances and sometimes by each other, but the longer love endures, — in many instances — the harder it is to break.